Careless lyrics

I guess I lied to you when I told you I like baseball
It`s not so much the game I like, it`s the hats

Ed, Do you see this black band `round my neck? (oohh yeah)
It`s not just fashion (oh really?)
Hartz made it to protect me from ticks, fleas, and gnats
I couldn`t care less, what`s in a chocolate mousse?
I couldn`t care less, what are the five fruits in Five-Alive juice?
I couldn`t care less, how old are Ernie and Bert?
I couldn`t care less, where does Barney Rubble work?

Well Shaggy said to Velma, `Hey now, Velma, how ya doin`?`
And Velma said, `Geesh, Shag, I`m just fine.`

And Daphne said to Fred, `Hey let`s get drunk down in the forest.`
And all night Fred was yackin` up red wine

I couldn`t care less, why was Fonzie cool?
I couldn`t care less, are the sweat hogs still in school?
I couldn`t care less, how do they fill the caramel bar?
I couldn`t care less, if my car says the door is ajar?
Well I wish I had a nickname like Crusher, Snake, or Kenneth
`Cause guys with nicknames always get the gals
When I grow up I`ll name my children Alice, Albert, and Alfred (really cool names)
I`ll call them for supper like this: `Dinner`s ready, Als!`

I couldn`t care less, what Morton Downey says?
I couldn`t care less, what`s on the head of my Pez?
I couldn`t care less, do zoodles need a trained zookeeper?
I couldn`t care less, why`s the Super Big Gulp cheaper?

I couldn`t care less, what`s in a chocolate mousse? (ground-up antlers)
I couldn`t care less, what are the five fruits in Five-Alive juice?
(apples, cheese, broccoli...)
I couldn`t care less, how old are Ernie and Bert? (they`re like four or something..)
I couldn`t care less, where does Barney Rubble work? (nobody knows!)

I couldn`t care less, why was Fonzie cool?
I couldn`t care less, are the sweat hogs still in school