Dr Phil lyrics

I`m lying here on your couch feeling lousy
My life`s a great big mess
I`m crying here and all you`ve done
Is perscribe me lots of drugs

I can`t stay on your Prozac
Cause it`s making me itch
I can`t stay on your Zoloft
Cause it`s making me twitch
I said I`m sick of all this medicine
So just stuff your little pitch
I found an alternative

Cause yesterday
I turned on the tube
And some bald headed dude
Started telling me what to do
And I swear
I don`t need your pills
Just give me some cable
And let me watch Dr. Phil
I need Dr. Phil

My eyes are glued to the screen as he lectures me
He tells me to get a grip
And all of the other shows they were different
Maybe Dr. Phil can help

I can`t stand my lifestyle
Cause it`s making me fat
I`m afraid to make commitments
Tell me what is up with that
I trying to potty train my kid again
But he`s being a little brat
I think I`ll write in today

Cause he cares
That I had an affair
And that I`m losing my hair
And that life can be so unfair
And I swear
I don`t need your pills
Just give me some cable
And let me watch Dr. Phil
I need Dr. Phil

He knows
That I`m watching his show
And that my job really blows
And that I like wearing pantyhose
And I swear
I don`t need your pills
Just give me some cable
And let me watch Dr. Phil
I need Dr. Phil

My friends think I`m a mama`s boy
But I tend to disagree
I`m still living with my parents
And I`m turning forty-three
I said I need to wash my hands again
Cause I`m feeling OCD
I think I`ll write in today

Cause he`s the man
With the seven step plan
And I`m his biggest fan
He`s my Shady and I`m his Stan
And I swear
I don`t need your pills
Just give me some cable
And let me watch Dr. Phil
I need Dr. Phil

He says
I need to get real
I need to get smart
I need to get going here
And I swear
I don`t need your pills
Just give me some cable
And let me watch Dr. Phil
I need Dr. Phil
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