Funny Honey lyrics

[ROXIE]
Sometimes I`m right
Sometimes I`m wrong
But he doesn`t care
He`ll string along
He loves me so
That funny honey of mine

Sometimes I`m down
Sometimes I`m up
But he follows `round
Like some droopy-eyed pup
He loves me so
That funny honey of mine

He ain`t no sheik
That`s no great physique
And Lord knows, he ain`t got the smarts

Oh, but look at that soul
I tell you, the whole
Is a whole lot greater than
The sum of his parts

And if you knew him like me
I know you`d agree
What if the world
Slandered my name?
Why, he`d be right there
Taking the blame

He loves me so
And it all suits me fine
That funny, sunny, honey
Hubby of mine

[AMOS (Spoken)]
A man`s got a right to protect his home
and his loved ones, right?

[FOGARTY (Spoken)]
Of course, he has.

[AMOS (Spoken)]
Well, I came in from the garage, Officer, and I
see him coming through the window. With my
wife Roxanne there, sleepin`...like an angel...

[ROXIE]
He loves me so
That funny honey of mine

[AMOS (Spoken)]
...an angel!

[AMOS (Spoken)]
I mean supposin`, just supposin`, he had violated
her or somethin`...you know what I mean...
violated?

[FOGARTY (Spoken)]
I know what you mean...

[AMOS (Spoken)]
...or somethin`. Think how terrible that would have been.
It`s a good thing I came home from work on time, I`m tellin` ya that! I say I`m tellin` ya that!

[ROXIE]
He loves me so
That funny honey of mine

[FOGARTY (Spoken)]
Name of deceased... Fred Casely.

[AMOS (Spoken)]
Fred Casely. How could he be a burglar?
My wife knows him! He sold us our furniture!

[ROXIE]
Lord knows he ain`t got the smarts!

[AMOS (Spoken)]
She lied to me. She told me he was a burglar!

[FOGARTY (Spoken)]
You mean he was dead when you got home?

[AMOS (Spoken)]
She had him covered with a sheet and she`s givin`
me this cock and bull story about a burglar, and how
I ought to say I did it `cause I was sure to get off. `Help me, Amos`, she said. `It`s my goddamn hour of need!`
Burglar, huh!

[ROXIE]
Now, he shot off his trap!

I can`t STAND that SAP!

Look at him go
Rattin` on me
With just one more brain
What a half-wit he`d be

If they string me up
(spoken) Well, I`ll know who
Bought the twine!

[AMOS (Spoken)]
And I believed her!
That cheap little tramp. So, she
Was two-timing me, huh?
Well, then, she can just
Swing for all I care.
Boy, I`m down at the garage,
Working my butt off fourteen
Hours a day and she`s up mucnhin`
on god-damn bon bons and jazzing.
This time she pushed me too far.
That little chiseler.
Boy, what I sap I was!

That scummy, crummy
DUMMY hubby of mine!
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