CB1: Reproduction or what?
CB2: What did you say?
CB1: What kind of production?
CB2: `There are all sorts of
possibilities...you could do, you
know, a little spoof on something...
V1: This is also nothing new.
CB1: Yeah, get some stuff together,
no problem, y`know, depends on what
you do...
A1 (Jack Armstrong): C`mon, let`s look...
V2: Journey?
W (The Weatherman):
Ha ha ha, ho...Oh, well...
V3: No, no, no, Uh-uh.
C (Casey Kasem): This
is American Top Forty.
W: I have climbed the highest mountains,
CB2: Uh, I believe that`s
the Weatherman there...
W: And guess what?
CB1: Where ya at?
W: I have run...through the fields...
only to be with you...yup, with you...
no one else, just you.
C: Here`s the first Top 40 hit...
W: And guess what?
C: ...for the Irish band from Dublin
who call themselves U2...
W: I have run, I have crawled,
I have scaled these city walls...
Yeah, that`s really great, I can`t
believe I did it, but nevertheless,
I have done that for you.
C: That`s the letter U
and the numeral 2.
W: Only to be with you,
I`ve done all these things.
C: The f-
W: Yeah, with you. The fat one,
that`s it...
C: The f-
W: You`re the fat one,
and I wanna be with you...
A1: What`s the matter?)
C: Can I say, why was
it changed here?
W: But on the other hand,
I still haven`t found
what I`m looking for.
C: That`s the letter U
and the numeral 2.
V3: Maybe they`ll make it
as a junior U2.
W: But on the other hand,
I still haven`t found
what I`m looking for.
C: That`s the letter U
and the numeral...
V3: They say...
W: Nope, definitely not.
C: ...two.
W: I haven`t found it.
V3: They say they`re
kinda like U2.
W: I just can`t seem
to find it.
C: That`s the letter U
and the numeral 2.
W: Nope, definitely not,
I haven`t found it.
C: That`s the letter U
and the numeral 2.
A1: C`mon.
W: And here`s what else I`ve done...
A1: C`mon, let`s see
what we can find.
W: I have kissed honey lips,
felt the healing in her fingertips.
I`ve even done that.
C: That`s the letter U
and the numeral 2.
W: While I was doing that--
y`know, all the kissing on
the honey lips?--
it burned like fire, and it
reminded me of cheap, melting
plastic--the kind that makes little
clouds of white vapo-gas and then
when it catches on fire, it makes those
little...little strings of black smoke with
little ashes attached to them.
That`s how it was kissing honey lips.
C: Why are we doing it?
Why have we changed something?)
W: And I still haven`t found it.
B (Bono): Uh...
W: What I`m looking for, that is.
I just don`t know where the Hell
it is...I just can`t seem to find it...
B: The last thing we wanted
to do was sound like anybody
else. So with U2...
C: That`s the letter U
and the numeral 2.
B: you`ve gotta challenge it, you
know, musically speaking, you know,
you`ve gotta find new sounds in a
guitar, you`ve gotta find a new way
of approaching a 4/4 beat. You know,
rock and roll still needs innovation
...and there`s a lot, there`s a...
there`s a lot out there.
V4: Someone has said, `Get a great
idea, a great purpose, marry it, and
raise a family.
C: What the Hell`s going on here?
V5: Bono.
A2: Why, Billy, look!
C: I should be saying,
`American Top 40 is heard
in the fifty states, and around the...`
V4: Are you two married
to a great idea?
C: It was...it was every week,
`American Top 40 is heard in the...`
A2: Everything is topsy-turvy!
A1: I`ll say it is!
C: Is it to just screw up things?
V4: Marriage is not you two
living for each other.
C: `Cause I can`t say this...y`know...
A1: Let`s see what we can find.
A2: Everything is such a mess!
C: Jeez, I thought we were
almost finished...
V4: It is you two uniting to live
as a team for this great purpose.
A1: What`s the matter?
Find something?
A2: No.
CBJ (CB jammer): [unintelligible]...
fuck his ass...go jerk his bone!
A2: No, I can`t find anything here.
WCB: That damn sewer-mouth is back again.
A2: There`s no one in here now...
CBJ: ...[unintelligible]...
A2: There`s nothing but Uncle Jim`s
shortwave radio set.)
C: Ponderous! Is Don on the phone?
D (Don): Hi, Casey. Uh, had `em
put me right on the speakerphone for
ya. Uh, now...I just got word from
Mr. Friday that, uh...uh, we can`t
pay you anything for this until, uh,
our label sends us some of the money
they owe us...so, this will, uh, have
to be benefit terms...so, uh...
C: Good golly, Miss Molly!
D: Well, I gotta catch a plane. Give
my regards to the Weatherman and, uh,
heh, You Too!
C: You know, they do this to me
all the time...I dunno what the hell
they do it for, but...
CB: Yeah that...the guy that was
talking to the sewer-mouth there,
bring `im back.
C: Now, make it--and I also want to
know what happened to the pictures I
was supposed to see this week?
WCB: Hey, sewer-mouth!
CBJ: Could be...hey, I`m on a
frequency, bet ya can`t find me!
CB: Hes`s got the
sideband out there?
C: That`s the letter 2,
and the numeral U.
W: Nyeh ha ha haaa.
I was a worm in the night
CB: [unintelligible]
W: And cold as a stone, I was.
C: Alright, alright...
OK, let`s try it, OK?
UMTV (MTV Rock Video Awards
presenter): Cyndi?
CL (Cyndi Lauper): OK...
W: And I believe in kingdom come...
UMTV: Cyndi?
CL: OK...
W: And all the colors
bleeding into one big mess.
CL: OK...
W: I`ll probably have to get out
the S.T.P. cleaner on that one,
maybe the 409, but I`m not sure yet.
CL: Uh...
C:That`s the letter U,
and the numeral 2.
UMTV: I have the envelope here...
W: And you broke the bonds.
CL: And uh...
W: You broke the goddamn bonds...
CL: And uh...
W: You loosened the chains...
UMTV: I have the envelope...
W: You carried a cross...
UMTV: I have the envelope here...
W: And my shame, and my shame...
Shame, shame, shame,
shame, shame...
CL: And uh...
W: So much shame, yeah.
Ha, ha, hoo, hoo, hee, ha, haaa.
CL And uh...I`m a
little nearsighted.
C: Why have we changed changed something
that we`ve been doing all along?
W: You know, I believe it.
C: Alright...
W: Nope, I guess I don`t
believe it...I don`t know
what I`m talking about...
C: This is, this is
blowin`...ya know...
W: But, nevertheless,
I still haven`t found it.
C: That`s the letter U...
W: I haven`t found what I`m
looking for, I haven`t found it...
C: I can`t say it again!
W: I`m lookin` for it, but I don`t
even know where it is.
C: ...and the numeral 2.
W: I don`t even really know...
CL: Before we announce
the winner...
W: ...anything anymore, I just...
C: See, that doesn`t
sound right either.
W: ...I don`t really
know what to do...
CL: Let`s just...
C: Alright...
CL: Let`s just...
W: ...or do I?
CL: ...recap...
C: OK, let`s just
try it, OK?
CL: ...the nominees.
W: But I still haven`t found it.
C: That`s the letter U,
and the numeral 2.
W: That doesn`t make sense:
`But I still haven`t found it,
I`m looking...`
UMTV: I have the envelope here...
W: `I`m...`, no, `I`m,
I`m looking for it...`
UMTV: I have the envelope here...
W: No, just: `I`m--
looking--for--it.`
UMTV: I have the envelope...
C: That`s the letter U,
and the numeral 2.
W: And...I...
CBJ: There ain`t nobody can
find me on this frequency.
W: Ha, ha, ha, ha...
MTVA (MTV Rock Video Awards
announcer): U2, U2, U2, U2...
W: I just don`t know much of
anything. Maybe I oughta be shot
point blank in the stamper tonight.
C: That`s the letter U,
and the numeral 2.
CBJ: Hey, c`mon, find me...
you can`t find me?...
C: Is that the way I say that?
I dunno how to say it.
MTVA: U2, `I Still Haven`t
What I`m Looking For`.
W: Well, I`ll be jiggered.
There it is.
C: We`re counting down the 40
biggest hits in the 50 states.
WCB: Hey sewer-mouth,
we`re gonna getcha.
C: `This is American Top 40...`
This is American Top 40, heard...`
...God, I hate that. We come outta
that, and then I gotta say
the goddamned Ameri...
CL: And uh...
C: I hear the American Top 40
jingle and then I say, `This is
American Top For...`
CL: And uh, the winner is...
C: Let the goddamn jingle I.D.
this show. I I.D. the show whenever
there isn`t a jingle, don`t I?
CL: The winner is...
C: Don`t I do it between every
goddamn record that we play?
CL: INXS!
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