Christmas is comin`, Christmas is comin`
Christmas is comin` again
But that never thrills me, the thought of it chills me
I tell you it fills me with pain
It makes me remember a Christmas gone by
When I was extremely upset
A night in December, an evening that I
Would very much rather forget
For I took me harp to a party but nobody asked me to play
The others were jolly and `earty but I wasn`t feelin` so gay
They might have said play us a tune we can sing
But somehow I don`t think they noticed the thing
I took me harp to a party but nobody asked me to play
So I took the darned thing away
They asked Mrs Morgan to play her mouth-organ
And somebody else did a dance
They Let Mrs Carter perform a sonata
But I wasn`t given a chance
A north country person called Sandy McPherson
Played bagpipes and took off his coat
While both the Miss Fawcetts bust out of their corsets
In trying to take a top note
But I took me harp to a party, nobody asked me to play
The others were jolly and `earty but I wasn`t feelin` so gay
I felt so ashamed at not strikin` a note
That I tried to hide the thing under me coat
I took me harp to a party but nobody asked me to play
So I took the darned thing away
They sang Home Sweet Home and The Banks of Loch Lomond
And All the King`s Horses, then Trees
While nephews and nieces kept playin` their pieces
And spreadin` their jam on the keys
A daughter called Lena, played her concertina
We all played ridiculous games
`Til old Mr Dyer, set his whiskers on fire
And a fire engine played on the flames