If A Girl Isn T Pretty lyrics

Funny girl is the life of vaudeville comedienne fanny brice (1891-1951), starting in 1910.
Actually the show starts after she has become a success on stage and flashes back to her
Origins. it opens in fanny`s dressing room. she is waiting for her husband, nick arnstein,
To return after being in prison. she looks back to when she was a 19-year old hopeful.
Her mother`s poker buddies think she`s wasting her life trying to break into show business.
Mrs. strakosh:
Fanny, when people pay good money in the the-ay-ter--
Especially the male element--they want something to look at!

If a girl isn`t pretty
Like a miss atlantic city,
All she gets in life
Is pity and a pat.
Mrs. brice:
Is a nose with deviation
Such a crime against the nation?
Should i throw her into jail
Or drown the cat?
Mrs. strakosh, o` malley and
Meeker:
She must shine in ev`ry detail
Like a ring you`re buying retail,
Be a standard size that
Fits a standard dress.
Mrs. strakosh:
When a girl`s incidentals
Are no bigger than two lentils
Mrs. strakosh, o` malley and
Meeker:
Then to me that doesn`t spell success.


Fanny auditions for keeney`s music hall but keeney kicks her out of the chorus
Because she doesn`t look like the others.
Eddie ryan, dance director for keeney, agrees:

Eddie:
If a girl isn`t pretty
Like a miss atlantic city,
She should dump the stage
And try another route.
Any guy who pays a quarter
For a seat just feels he oughter
See a figger that his wife can`t
Substitute.

Kid, my heart ain`t made of marble
But your rhythm`s really horr`ble
And that map of yours just ain`t no
Valentine.
Everything you got`s about right,
But the damn thing don`t come out right
So forget it, kid,
And just resign.
Chorus:
If a girl isn`t pretty,
If a girl isn`t pretty,
If a girl isn`t pretty,
If a girl isn`t pretty,
If a girl isn`t pretty,
She should get a job,
Go get a job--
Get any job
Get a weekly pay,
`cause if a girl isn`t pretty
Like a miss atlantic city,
She`s a real miss nobody, u.s.a.