Inflate you waistcoat, wind down your eyes,
Tie on your best smile, check your disguise.
Dryclean your old jokes, practise despair,
Hide your relations under the stairs.
You`re invited to attend the turkey party convention;
Isn`t that nice?
You can leave your troubles at the door
We have ways to make you cheer
As long as you`re not sick or poor
A negro or a queer.
We can fit you with a suit of clothes
That will make you look like us,
An appointments book and a new outlook
A ladder or a truss
Have another cup of reality
Drink and drink some more!
You can own a boat, a house, a car,
Or live like Howard Hughes;
Come on what have you got to lose...
And if you`re discreet there are pleasures sweet
You can even swap your wife
If you`11 only sign the dotted une
You`11 be fine... Oh so fine...
Thank you for joining here are your pills
The man in the white coat wilI send you the bill.
Would you like to meet
Our most distinguished member... a doctor Faustus by name!
Is my face on straight?
Will they laugh at the gate
Oh I mustn` t be late
Is my face on straight?
Is my face on straight?
Will they let me throught the gate
Oh I mustn`t be late
Is my face on straight... Is my face on straight...
Is my face on straight?