Lonely Yooper lyrics

1. I LOOKED DOWN INTO HER BLOODSHOT EYES
SHE SAID �??SAVE A BEER FOR ME`
I SAID, `I�??LL HAVE TO DRINK IT LATER CAUSE NOW I GOTTA PEE�?�
SHE REACHED DOWN AND GRABBED MY GONADS
AND SHE SQUEEZED �??EM IN HER HAND
SHE SAID �??YOU AIN�??T GOING NOWHERE
CAUSE NOW I NEED A MAN�?�
2. BUT I GOTTA GO REAL BAD
AND I JUST CAN`T TAKE A CHANCE
I GOTTA BEAT IT FOR THE OUTHOUSE BEFORE I *** MY PANTS
THEN WE BOTH HEARD SOMETHING COMING
AND IT SOUNDED LIKE A TANK
SHE SAID, �??HOLY SIT IT`S TOIVO!�?�
AND SHE GAME �??EM ONE LAST YANK

CHORUS:
I WAS JUST A LONELY YOOPER SHE GRABBED ME BY THE RUMP
SHE SAID HER HUSBAND TOIVO HE LAID THERE LIKE A STUMP
SHE SAID, �??YOU DON`T HAVE TO WORRY WE`LL BE SAFE OUT HERE`
`TOIVO NEVER COMES TO CAMP UNLESS HE`S HUNTING DEER�?�

3. THEN I SAW OLE`�?? TOIVO,
HE WAS LOADING UP HIS GUN
I RAN OUT FOR THE OUTHOUSE, I THINK HE SAW ME RUN
WHEN TOIVO CAME STOMPING DOWN THE PATH
I THINK HE HEARD ME GROAN
BUT WHEN HE OPENED THE OUTHOUSE DOOR
THERE WAS NO ONE ON THE THRONE

4. I LOOKED UP FROM THE SIT PILE
AT THE HOLE I JUST JUMPED THROUGH
I WAS SINKING PAST MY SHOULDERS
I WONDERED WHAT HE`D DO
THEN TOIVO DROPPED HIS TROUSERS
AND I WISHED THAT I WAS DEAD
I COULD HEAR HIM UP THERE GIGGLING
AS HE SIT UPON MY HEAD

(REPEAT CHORUS)
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