Super Skier lyrics

(Gibson/Rieser/Rieser)
Well, they called him Super Skier
As he sat around the sundeck,
For he swore that he would never take a spill.
When they finally brought him down
They had to use three toboggans
To carry all the pieces down the hill.
CHORUS:
He was comin` down that slope
Doin` ninety miles an hour
When he caught an edge of his ski.
Well, his clothes, they were fast,
But the slopes, they were faster.
That`s the last of Super Skier we shall see.
Well, he hollered, `What the hell!`
As he lined them parallel:
He figured there was nothing more to learn.
(Oh, no...)
And as he started on his way,
He shouted, `Ondelay!`,
Assuming that he`d never have to turn.
Well, he was slippin` down that slope
Doin` ninety miles an hour
When a mogul flipped him in the air.
His jumping form was fine
Until he ran into that pine,
And two one-legged skiers left from there.
(repeat CHORUS)
When he left that tree at last,
He was moving twice as fast.
Both halves were skimming moguls like a feather.
He said, `If I must be
A split personality,
How can I ever keep my knees together?`
One ski was headed north,
And the other headed west,
`Cause both of them, you see, were running freer.
And folks up on Little Nell
Looked up, scared as hell,
Said, `It`s a bird.``No, it`s a plane.``It`s Super Skier!`
(No, uh, it`s a bird.)
(repeat CHORUS)
Now the moral of my story
(Though my story`s kinda gory):
For all you sundeck Charlies, there`s still hope.
You buy the fastest clothes you can,
Then talk skiing like a man,
But don`t let people catch you on the slope!
(repeat CHORUS)
And let`s get Charlie off the M. T. A.