Well my wife went out of town `bout a year or so back
And left me at home by myself to bach
And after five straight nights of T.V. I was ready to scream.
So I called up this beer drinkin` buddy of mine
I said, `Bill, I ain`t havin` a real good time.`
He said, `Why don`t we go to the wrasslin` matches and let off
a little steam?`
The main event was the Spider from parts unknown
With his trusty partner, the Blue Cyclone.
They was takin` on a team that never had been beat.
Now I`d never seen the matches before
And the crowd was backed up plum out the door,
But me an` ol` Bill lucked out and got ringside seats.
Well then they rang the bell and all Hell broke loose
My legs was shakin` like a rubber goose
I`d never seen anything like this, not even in the war!
The Cyclone put the Vulture in an airplane spin
then he body slammed him, and he did it again
I swear I didn`t see how thal old boy could take much more.
It was right about then in the thick of things
My buddy Bill threw a chair in the ring
And I knew we`d better be headin` for the door.
`Cause I saw the Cyclone lookin` at us
And he was rubbin` his head and he started to cuss
And I knew if he caught us he`d break Bill`s neck for sure.
Well, where we parked wasn`t too far
And Bill ran so fast he beat me to the car,
Locked the doors and wasn`t about to let anyone in.
And I turned around and the Cyclone was there
And he said, `Hey punk, you forgot your chair!`
And by the look in his eyes, I knew that this was the end.