The President S Penis Is Missing lyrics

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The President S Penis Is Missing lyrics

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<pre><font size='+2'>THE PRESIDENT S PENIS IS MISSING lyrics DRIVE BY TRUCKERS</font><br>(NEWS FLASH!!!)<br />
<br />
(scene: the press corps have descended upon the White House, a spokesperson<br />
begins to speak:)<br />
<br />
“They looked in the White House and Capitol Hill<br />
They looked everywhere for Buffalo Bill<br />
We called every scholar, reporter, and genius<br />
Has anyone seen the President`s penis?‿<br />
<br />
“It ain`t in the Congress or Judiciary<br />
It ain`t in the Smithsonian or that big ole library<br />
an astronomer claims it was sighted on Venus<br />
Has anyone seen the President`s penis?‿<br />
<br />
(now the entire press corp. erupts in song:)<br />
“THE PRESIDENT`S PENIS IS MISSING OLE`!!!<br />
WE SEARCHED HIGH AND LOW, EVERY NIGHT EVERYDAY<br />
LORD, WON`T YOU COME DOWN AND REDEEM US<br />
HAS ANYONE SEEN THE PRESIDENT`S PENIS?‿<br />
<br />
(at this point, legendary news man Walter Cronkite returns from the moon to<br />
add his commentary:)<br />
“Now Presidents have goofed up in all kinds of ways<br />
in the 80`s we elected one missing his brain<br />
George Washington caught a cold he couldn`t explain<br />
and we all know the truth about Thomas Jefferson`s name‿<br />
<br />
(suddenly William Randolph Hurst rises from the grave and bellows out in an<br />
Orson Welles type voice:)<br />
“Franklin D. Roosevelt wasn`t no square <br />
with that raging Woodrow in his wheelchair<br />
and all the lesbians snickered that Elenor didn`t care<br />
and John Kennedy`s penis was seen everywhere‿<br />
<br />
(once again everyone breaks out in gleeful song:)<br />
“THE PRESIDENT`S PENIS IS MISSING OLE`!!!<br />
WE SEARCHED HIGH AND LOW EVERY NIGHT EVERY DAY<br />
LORD WON`T YOU COME DOWN AND REDEEM US<br />
HAS ANYONE SEEN THE PRESIDENT`S PENIS?‿<br />
<br />
(the scene shifts to Sen. John Glenn, wandering pensively, somewhere in space:)<br />
“Them outer space people would laugh if they`d seen us<br />
all this talk about cum-stains and oral coitus<br />
meanwhile the whole world suffers from hunger and meanness<br />
but we`re more concerned with the President`s penis‿<br />
<br />
THE END?<br />
lyrics by Patterson Hood<br><br><a href='http://www.lyricsbay.com' target='_blank'>LyricsBay</a> | <a href="http://www.lyricsbay.com/the_president_s_penis_is_missing_lyrics-drive_by_truckers.html" target='_blank'>THE PRESIDENT S PENIS IS MISSING lyrics DRIVE BY TRUCKERS</a></pre>

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The President S Penis Is Missing lyrics

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(NEWS FLASH!!!)

(scene: the press corps have descended upon the White House, a spokesperson
begins to speak:)

“They looked in the White House and Capitol Hill
They looked everywhere for Buffalo Bill
We called every scholar, reporter, and genius
Has anyone seen the President`s penis?‿

“It ain`t in the Congress or Judiciary
It ain`t in the Smithsonian or that big ole library
an astronomer claims it was sighted on Venus
Has anyone seen the President`s penis?‿

(now the entire press corp. erupts in song:)
“THE PRESIDENT`S PENIS IS MISSING OLE`!!!
WE SEARCHED HIGH AND LOW, EVERY NIGHT EVERYDAY
LORD, WON`T YOU COME DOWN AND REDEEM US
HAS ANYONE SEEN THE PRESIDENT`S PENIS?‿

(at this point, legendary news man Walter Cronkite returns from the moon to
add his commentary:)
“Now Presidents have goofed up in all kinds of ways
in the 80`s we elected one missing his brain
George Washington caught a cold he couldn`t explain
and we all know the truth about Thomas Jefferson`s name‿

(suddenly William Randolph Hurst rises from the grave and bellows out in an
Orson Welles type voice:)
“Franklin D. Roosevelt wasn`t no square
with that raging Woodrow in his wheelchair
and all the lesbians snickered that Elenor didn`t care
and John Kennedy`s penis was seen everywhere‿

(once again everyone breaks out in gleeful song:)
“THE PRESIDENT`S PENIS IS MISSING OLE`!!!
WE SEARCHED HIGH AND LOW EVERY NIGHT EVERY DAY
LORD WON`T YOU COME DOWN AND REDEEM US
HAS ANYONE SEEN THE PRESIDENT`S PENIS?‿

(the scene shifts to Sen. John Glenn, wandering pensively, somewhere in space:)
“Them outer space people would laugh if they`d seen us
all this talk about cum-stains and oral coitus
meanwhile the whole world suffers from hunger and meanness
but we`re more concerned with the President`s penis‿

THE END?
lyrics by Patterson Hood

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